I ran into an old…old friend almost a week ago. It has been at least 5 years since I have seen or spoken to him. I saw his mom one time when I went back home to visit my family and friends, but my contact with him was non-existent. We were good friends once. We spent a great amount of time together, especially during summer vacations when neither one of us was in school. No sexual attraction, we both like Men… but we were very good friends with much in common.
When I first saw him, when we first made eye contact I became immediately excited. We looked at each other, recognized each other (both looking different than we did 5 years ago) and then we smiled and embraced. The hug was warm and inviting. It was sincere, as if we had been missing one another for the five years that we were not in touch.
We exchaged numbers and promised to call each other. Here it is almost a week has passed and we have not talked. Neither one of us has called the other. He did send me a text message the other night saying hello. I responded with a very enthusiastic “hey, what’s up?” (you must understand, that is enthusiastic for me!) he responded by saying, “nothing much, just skating down memory lane I guess.” After that I replied by saying, “what exactly are you thinking about?” There was no response….
The way that we stopped speaking was so abrupt. One day we were good friends hanging out and talking as usual, and the next days rolled by and we were no longer speaking. From my point of view, I think it had to do with money, but not neccessarily on my part. He borrowed some money from me, and was not able to pay it back in the time that he said he would. I did need the money back because it was not a small sum for me, especially being a college freshmen at the time. But instead of trying to work something out with me, he just avoided me and eventually I stopped calling.
The funny thing is, during the time that I was calling him and he was avoiding me, I would have never once asked him for the money back. I didn’t care. My father also told me, “If you can’t afford to lose it, don’t loan it out, because 9 times out of 10, you will not get it back.” So in my opinion, it was my own fault for allowing him to borrow it, when I knew I would need it back.
The point is, I would not have ended our friendship if he was unable to pay me back, but he assumed that of me and allowed our friendship to die.
We may or may not speak again, I am not sure, but whatever happens I know that I handled the situation the best that I knew how, and now that I have seen him again I am skating down memory lane thinking about all of the good times and memories that we had and how string our bond was..and honestly, now, I kind of miss that…